Teenage dream...

Today I ran my first group with teenage mothers in the high school. What I went in thinking and what I came out thinking was worlds apart. The world has a preconceived idea of teenage girls who are pregnant in that they are these promiscuous young girls who have gone out and got themselves into these situations, had the baby and left the responsibility to their mothers or grans and carried on with their lives like nothing ever happened. I expected to be going in and assisting these girls to explore their roles as mothers, to be the mothers their babies needed whilst still being a child…. But that is not what happened. We did an activity which got the girls talking about their lives and what was happening currently. As the stories unfolded it became a common thread that for these young girls their babies were their escape. The babies are the light in their very dingy dark lives. It was hard for me to fathom because for me, and many of my friends having a baby now would kind of ‘ruin’ our lives. My goals and plans would have to change dramatically. It would be hard not to be frustrated and devastated. However for these girls on the other hand, having a baby is a way out from their unhappy lives of mothers with mental illnesses; situations of being homeless and households overflowing with drugs and alcohol. They were proud to be mothers…. they explained their babies as being the only thing making them smile…. I was confused and shocked by this at first but giving it some thought it makes so much sense to me now. Their greatest desire was to be the best mother they could be to their children; they want to finish school so that they can work and provide for their children one day. Completely not what I was expecting. Once again the world changes me – wasn’t I meant to be changing the world?